Peach and Blessings All,
When I was a freshman in high school, I was a proud member of the track team. I threw the shot put, ran the 200 meter race and was a member of the 4 x 400 relay team. I didn’t set any records but I was considered a solid runner who usually placed 1st, 2nd or 3rd in most races. My team was composed of approximately 30 predominately white kids. Kids who were either on the team to stay fit for the cross-country track team or who were just on the team to have an extra curricular activity on their school records.
The track & field season consisted of 15 track meets (a track and field competition between two or more teams) and about 6 of those track meets were held (away) at the school of the opposing team. On the days that our meets were away, we would have to load the bus with our equipment and ride to the other school. Who would have known that those bus rides would be so much fun? We would be laughing, talking and unconsumed by the pending competition. Once we arrived at the track, we would unload the bus, set up any equipment and change into our track shoes. Then we would be instructed to stretch and warm–up our muscles.
I clearly remember the day that my team was scheduled to compete against the track team of a school named Armstrong-Kennedy High School. Armstrong-Kennedy was a predominately black school on the other side of town. As my 30 team mates and I stretched, the Armstrong-Kennedy team started to populate the field. At first there were about 20 Armstrong-Kennedy team members but quickly their number increased. My team stood in awe as approximately 100 kids dressed in matching blue and gold sweat suits begin to do jumping jacks in sync. It was at that moment, before a single race had begun, that my team was defeated. We had not been defeated by Armstrong-Kennedy’s track team, we had been defeated by our expectation of what we thought one hundred in tune team mates could accomplish.
Isn’t it funny how what we expect is usually the seed that gestates into our reality? So let me ask you a question, “What are your expectations for your marriage?” Are you looking at the marriages in your family, neighborhood, society, church, etc and expecting your marriage to have the same outcome? Are you expecting your wife to be bossy because your mother had a domineering manner? Are you expecting your husband to cheat because “they say” that all men cheat? (Sidebar: Who is “they”? In my experience, “they” is a cowardly tool of the enemy. Therefore, ignore what “they” says because “they” is a liar.) Perhaps you expect to be unhappily married because the married couples you see appear to be discontented. – Why is it that we often expect defect and rarely expect victory?
I have retired from competition. However, I am still part of a team just as you are. That team is the Body of Christ and our marriages represent the entire team. And I don’t know about you, but I expect the members of God’s team to win.